In a local shop window there was an advertisement: “Wanted: time managers, time investors, time reapers!” No qualifications were stated except this curious statement: “Ability to find time for the things you find boring and unimportant, and pay to be negotiated.”

Many applicants came forward, and from initial interviews among the list of things that people found boring and unimportant were going to Church, and participating in the ministry there. All the applicants agreed that if they were paid to attend, they would certainly find the time for the things that they listed as boring and unimportant.

Now, it was time to negotiate the pay: quite a few people promised to attend Church and participate in the activities there, if they were paid £12,000 per annum. Jim and Joan were selected: they were offered £24,000 each per annum. They jumped at it, the extra bonus was to ensure their commitment. They went down to their local pub to celebrate with their friends.

Their new Church met only thrice a week for a total of five hours. In addition, they had a worship team that met once a week for three hours, and a prayer team that met once every fortnight for three hours.

Jim and Joan found the experience extremely worthwhile, the first three months flew past in a whirl, everything was going like clock-work. The only problem they had was that this was just a job for them, just another job. Knowing Christ, putting your faith in Him, repenting of your sin was going way over their head.

The subject of heaven and hell came through their fourth month, in the fifth and sixth months, the pastor moved on to even more daring sermons about worldliness and immorality.

By the seventh month, Holy Ghost baptism was hot on the plate and there was great talk and excitement that the Third Person of the Trinity was coming, and that members would receive exceptional gifts to do wonderful things to the glory of God. It was all going to happen during the annual Praise Festival.

By this time, it was clear to Jim and Joan, you don’t need to make a job out of coming to Church, you need solid faith in Christ. It was impossible to follow Christ on the basis of how much you got paid.

They looked around them, they found Sister Lukewarm. Sister Lukewarm told them her many problems and confessed that because she had been lukewarm all her Christian life, her problems had never diminished, they had only multiplied.

They spoke to Brother Inconsistency, he was of the same opinion. Mrs Idleness was at hand to let them know how foolish she had been not serving the Lord actively. “Look at this little thumb of mine”, said Mrs Idleness, Jim and Joan had a good look, the thumb was the smallest they had ever seen. “I cannot even lift it for the Lord”, confessed Mrs Idleness, “I am a baddie. Praise Festival should sort me out.”

Jim and Joan moved on quickly. They found Mr Wanderer. He gave them a good piece of his mind: “I have been to many Churches, I have never really found one to settle in. They all have faults. I am a rolling stone.” Then Mr Wanderer confessed, “Christ is not coming for rolling stones though!”

Jim and Joan then went to their Worship Team leader, good man that he was, versed in Scripture and pentecostal hymns, he was practising his tunes for Praise Festival when the couple walked in. They told him their problem. Being a man full of the Holy Ghost, he prayed with them and counselled them. They started singing “Have you been to Jesus for the cleansing power, are you washed in the blood of the Lamb?”

 

“Listen”, said Mr Worship Team Leader, “Nobody needs to drag you to Church by promising you bumper earthly rewards. If you are His sheep, you will be found in His pasture. Where your Lord is, there you will be.”
Are you a Christian? Are you fervent for the Lord? Or, are you still seeking to believe? Have you strayed on to our website? You did not get here by coincidence: Jesus wants to touch your life. Pray that your life will be renewed through His power. Pray that the joy of His salvation may be granted to you.